Not again!

25 Sep

Boston Children’s Hospital scheduling called us again today. They moved Malachi’s surgery AGAIN! This is the 3rd time. They rescheduled for 10/19 and I am now left to try to figure out all of our plans again and pay an additional $1500 to change everything (and this is with travel insurance!!). We do not have the money right now. I am seriously about to have a meltdown. Work is stressful knowing this is coming. Home is stressful knowing this is coming. I don’t think they realize the amount of stress this is in my life. The scheduler seriously needs some people skills. She does not act compassionate at all. I need to just type this so I can get it off my chest and hopefully feel better. My son is having a very high-risk open heart surgery. They have told us that some children do not make it and wanted us to confirm that we understand the complexity of this surgery. Getting the call today, knowing that God is in control and his timing is perfect, I am now left wondering if God is giving us more time with Malachi. Is he not going to make it through this surgery? This is honestly what is going through my mind! I cannot imagine our life without him. He and Josiah are best brothers. I am bawling sitting here and I have already cried to our nanny Tiffany earlier today. My heart cannot handle the not knowing. I want to be on the other side of this surgery. I want to know what is going to happen. Is my son’s broken heart going to be fixed and will he live a long life? Please Lord hear my prayer. Please bless Malachi. Please help these doctors to quit moving our surgery date! Mama is going to have a breakdown.

2 Responses to “Not again!”

  1. Cira Abreu September 26, 2018 at 2:03 am #

    Trust the Lord Jayde, and pray. Think positive. Be strong for your family. God bless you all.

  2. Marla Hartson September 26, 2018 at 9:07 am #

    God is not worried,
    He’s not afraid.
    He is not troubled
    By what I can’t see

    When fears assail me,
    When doubts collide,
    God is not worried,
    He’s right by my side

    I wish I could call you and sing you the whole song.

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